Welcome to our outlet for complaining about all things camping. If you’d like to read something positive or inspirational, or are deciding whether or not camping is for you, you’d probably be best to close your computer now.
Here are the top 4 things we absolutely HATE about camping:
- People who set up right next to you when the whole park is empty.
You’ve purposefully found a camp spot that’s private. You’ve set up your awning, your table and chairs and your roof is up. You are just about to take off your clothes!! when….another van rolls up and parks RIGHT NEXT TO YOURS, even though THE REST OF THE CAMPGROUND IS VIRTUALLY EMPTY! You could turn the music up, you could tell them you’ve got a baby that screams all night, you could pretend to start having a domestic with your partner, loudly. This annoyed me no end, don’t you go camping for the privacy? To drink beer in your undies? Then we started free camping in Europe and after a while I caught on, these people want to come and park right next to us for the SECURITY. They feel like they are safer when there are other people right next to them, watching over their van and able to hear them scream at night. This makes sense in SOME situations but please, not really in Australia and definitely not in a nice family friendly BIG 4.
- The best campsites are always the furthest away from the amenities.
We always try super hard to park as far away as possible from other people in campgrounds. They don’t want to see us drinking beer in our undies and we don’t want to hear their TV. At reception we ask for the park map and have a look, 80% of the time the non-powered sites are on the fringes of the park, and hopefully the park is bordering a national park or some other type of greenery (just check it’s not a main road which is also often the case!). Ask for the over-flow area, the area that fills up the last. The only problem – these spots are always the furthest away from the amenities, the toilets, the camp kitchen. Which means a longer walk in the middle of the night for a wee. DAMN.
- The time-consuming process of checking into campgrounds.
This might be slightly my fault for being so picky about which spot we get and coming back multiple times after walking laps of the park to suss out the best spots BUT if you are doing a real road trip and staying only a night or two in each place, the form filling, the key deposit, the boom gate codes, on-site restaurant opening times, are they really necessary? Do you REALLY need my DOB, email address, colour of my van and blood type? I’m essentially only parking my vehicle here for a night. Even Airbnb doesn’t ask for half of this crap!
- Campsites that are way too close together and have no barrier between them.
Plant some trees or as they do in European campsites, get into Topiary. I don’t want to hear my neighbours snoring at night. I don’t want to be packed like sardines into what is essentially a carpark with a toilet and shower provided. These places just scream MONEY MAKING TRAP!